That Warm, Fuzzy Feeling.

I've been doing alot of reflecting the past couple of days. I originally started writing this post this morning as I sat there and did laundry. It ballooned to something really long and detailed, but I figured that maybe short and sweet would be the better way to go. All the reflecting started on the busride home from the House 2 trip. When I first heard about the trip, I was a little skeptical. Even after House 3 went and some of the people came back telling us how great it was, I couldn't help still be a little cynical. "Right, how awesome could it really be.", I thought. Ass. I really turned out great. A few highlights:
- pulling off the log walk.
- talking that kid through the whole thing.
- the props everyone have me afterward.
- getting to spend most of the day with two great people.
- the view from the beach.
- helping my friend during the rock wall.
- the cartwheel competition, that I did awesome in.
   Ultimately it was a great trip that made me feel really good about myself.
   Last night I got to have dinner to celebrate a great friend's birthday. Originally, I didn't think I was going to make it because of the hectic morning and afternoon I had, not to mention my financial situation leaves alot to be desired. Come on March 5th! So when I told my friend I couldn't make it because I was broke, she said come anyway. I told her I couldn't do that. She said I was a good friend and she wanted me there. So I went. At the end of the evening, I tried to pay, but her husband just handed me back my card and she have me this look. After having my card handed back to me twice. I just gave up and my friend smiled at me. When we got up to leave, I have her a hug and said, "Thanks". She said she was happy to have me there.
  There was that warm and fuzzy feeling again.
 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yup, that's pretty much how I feel right about now. Why is it that whenever something seems like its finally going to work, something, in this case someone, has to come along and fuck things up. Is it too much to ask to have one thing go right at that fuckin' school?!?!? NOTHING will ever work as long as people are are just thinking about themselves. "Best interest of the kids"? Why must people be so unprofessional, petty and worried about being left "out of the loop". Maybe your ass is fucking the loop up!

You Like Me, You Really Like Me

Its comforting to realize, or be reminded every once in a while, that you have people that care about you and will be there for you when you need them. Whether your paycheck wasn't deposited on time or if Best Buy didn't have the blu-ray you were dead set on buying (I was devastated), its cool to know that people will be there to help you get out of your funk. Thank you, friends!

Practice What I Preach

"Don't worry about the things you can't control."        -     Me                    I've found myself telling friends this whenever they're stressed out and usually it makes them feel a little better. I don't know why I don't follow my own advice. I have no control over the way people think or act, then why do I let people's actions get to me so much. Why do I overthink situations, to the point of making me sad or even sick (the great ulcer of '97). Maybe I just care about a few people way more than I should.

Drink Responsibly

     I really don't get why some people drink. Don't get me wrong. I love a good drink. Usually, its in a social setting, with some good friends. I don't drink to drown my sorrows or just for the hell of it. Of late, I've even been surprised as to how much alcohol I can consume and still be somewhat functional.
    Anyway, some people should not drink. This was never more evident than last night in Hermosa Beach. From the guy who asked me if I was"gangster" because I told him I lived in South Central, to the guy having to be restrained in a front face-lock by his homeboy outside of a bar. Do these people ever think, "Hmm...maybe I've had enough.".

Take #1

    Well, I have a blog. Now, I need to figure out what to do with it. It's not like I have anything incredibly important to share or some great wisdom to give to the world. I have noticed that as I've gotten older, I feel the need to express myself more. My art has always been my favorite form of expression, but when it comes to writing down my thoughts, all my previous attempts have failed miserably. I will try not to let history repeat itself. Since no one knows about this yet, I guess I'm writing for myself, for now. But the first person I will share this with is the person that served as it's inspiration. Thanks, Lila. You are awesome, always remember that. Especially between 8am-2:47pm.